Monday, August 18, 2008

Courtney.....College bound


Courtney move to USC happens tomorrow. There, I've said it. It's happening. My heart is heavy, sad, empty, knowing that my baby is moving on. College bound, 8 long driving hours away. Her stuff is almost packed. We are checking the list and then checking it twice. What else do we need to pick up? Courtney is my youngest, my last born. She was part of our and God's perfect plan for us. We have been blessed abundantly.

Courtney is a red-headed, bright and articulate 18 year old. She is brighter than I ever dreamed of being and she is an avid reader. She is not afraid to speak her mind and she is beautiful. Wow, she is my baby girl.

Courtney's boyfriend, Cameron is going away to a different College. He is going to UC Santa Barbara. They will be about 2 hours away from each other. He starts school next month. I know that they are both hurting inside. They can already feel the others absence. They cling to each other as if they are part of a lifeline. It is heavy on my heart to know that they will grieve for the loss of the other. They have been together for two years. Cameron is a part of our family and Courtney a part of his.

This heaviness I feel is awkward. I sit at this computer and write. I want to run, but I don't want to be away from my daughter. Even though she is asleep, I know that she is here. I'm afraid to leave this house. My time with her is limited.

My heart is heavy but joyful too. I am confident that she will soar. We have given her wings and now we will watch her fly. Fly away, baby girl, but please come back. I will miss you, sweetie. We will keep the light on for you.

6 comments:

shawn said...

Such a sweet touching post. It didn't seem that long ago when she would come over in her little animal slippers to spend the night with me. You are right that she is totally gonna soar. I'd like to ride down with you the next time you visit her and chelsea and caleb.
Whenever you feel a bit lonely... come over and play wii....

Will said...

It feels like yesterday when I left for college, also USC. With two daughters now it's only a matter of time before they follow suit. Its all good. Keep on running!

kelly said...

Shawn, I'll be right over!! Get out the wii....

kelly said...

Thanks Will. It's good and it sucks all at the same time. Did you like USC? I hope she will love it there. Thanks for the comment!

rick said...

Funny, my mom and I talked about this today. She was telling me about the time when she first left for college. How my grandmother was wanting to spend all her remaining time with her before she left. I feel for the young lovers.

olga said...

I am actually jealous:) Just think how much I rather be in your place...she is beautiful, indeed, and
everything will be just fine. Babies are the most difficult to let go. It's personal - when they grow up, we get older. You don't Kelly. Feel good.